DATELINE: PLYMOUTH COUNTY AND AVON, EASTON AND STOUGHTON, MA.
A caregiver’s role involves many emotions and striking a balance between these emotions is a challenge for the caregiver. However, if you separate the emotions from the tasks involved in care giving, much of the things like doing grocery shopping, or the laundry, paying the bills or handling the paperwork are pretty routine. Looking after your aging parents’ household chores is not caring. It is the emotional support you can provide to them in their twilight years that makes the difference.
If you are helping your elderly parent through the trial of coping with a terminal illness, they will need all the emotional support you can provide them. Although they may put up a brave front, they may be experiencing emotional turmoil due to the realization of the approaching end of their lives. As a caregiver your personal emotions at dealing with this reality, is grief. You have to try to cope with the grief together, as best as you can. At the funeral of an elderly person who has passed away due to a terminal illness, you often find that the primary caregiver is not grieving as much as the others. This is because he or she has been trying to cope with the idea for some time and has usually got used to it by then.
The two emotions associated with eldercare are compassion and pity. Your emotions as a care giver in the final months of the terminally ill elder have a direct effect on how you carry out the task of care giving. The emotion of pity involves feeling sorry for your parent’s suffering whereas the emotion of compassion will make you understand the need of your parent, apart from feeling the pain, and try to help in any manner possible.
As a care giver, you have to manage your emotions and influence your reaction to the elderly parent’s illness. A compassionate caregiver is most successful in his endeavor to make the elder’s life comfortable. There are three important factors to keep in mind to help manage your emotions and control your reactions to the difficult times that lie ahead, and these are:
? Focus your energies and attention on the person you are caring for and not on yourself. Focusing on them builds a bond between the two of you whereas focusing on yourself will breed resentment and self pity.
? Do not dwell on the problem, but instead try to find a solution to it. Focus on the solution to a problem and not on its effects. A good doctor will cure the disease, not the symptoms.
? Focus on the joyful moments and not on the grief and sadness. Take one day at a time and try to find moments of joy when your parents can share a good laugh with you or enjoy a meal or a good film. Being together and sharing the joys and also the pain is the core of the caregiver’s role.
Keeping these three facts in mind will help to keep your emotions under control. It will also help you to function out of compassion and not pity. This will help you to keep your perspective ease the pain and grief to some extent.
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DATELINE: PLYMOUTH COUNTY AND AVON, EASTON AND STOUGHTON, MA.
Old Colony Elder Services (OCES), a private, non-profit agency that provides seniors, families and caregivers with valuable resources and services, offers tips to help elders stay cool this summer.
Avoid strenuous activity or over-exertion in the heat. Even household chores such as laundry, vacuuming, gardening, mowing the lawn, painting and so forth should be put off until the weather cools.
Avoid extended periods of sun exposure. If you must be in the sun, wear a hat, sunscreen and sunglasses and bring an umbrella to create shade.
Drink plenty of fluids. Avoid caffeinated or alcoholic beverages.
Eat well-balanced, light meals. Try to avoid high protein foods as they will increase metabolic heat.
Wear lightweight, loose and light colored clothing.
When it’s hot or very humid, stay indoors in an air-conditioned area or near a fan.
Go to a place where you can get relief from the heat such as a library, theater or community area that has air-conditioning.
Avoid heat related illnesses
In extreme heat and high humidity, evaporation of perspiration is slowed and the body must work extra hard to maintain normal temperature. Heat related illnesses include heat cramps which are muscular pains and spasms in the abdominal or leg muscles caused by loss of water due to heavy sweating. To treat heat cramps – rest in a cool place and drink half a glass of cool water every fifteen minutes.
Heat exhaustion is when the body overheats in high temperatures and/or high humidity, causing a form of mild shock. A rapid pulse, intense sweating, nausea, headache, dark urine, pale and/or flushed skin and feeling faint are some of the symptoms of heat exhaustion. To treat it, get the person to a cooler place and apply cool, wet cloths to the face and body. Have the person drink cool water slowly every fifteen minutes. Watch the person carefully for signs of heat stroke.
Heatstroke occurs when the body’s temperature reaches 104 degrees Fahrenheit or above. It is severe and life-threatening. It’s typically caused by exertion in hot weather and dehydration. Some signs of heatstroke include rapid heartbeat, hot red skin, absence of sweating, dizziness, headache, nausea, irritability or confusion. Older adults may also experience fainting. If any of these symptoms are suspected, call 911 immediately. Then move the person to a cooler place, immerse in a cool bath or wrap him/her in wet sheets. Watch for breathing problems. If he/she has changes is levels of consciousness, refuses water or is vomiting, do not give him/her anything to eat or drink.
OCES has resources available to elders in their service area who meet the criteria for low income and who cannot afford fans or air-conditioning. For assistance or more information, call (508) 584-1561.
OCES serves elders, their families and caregivers in the towns of Abington, Avon, Bridgewater, Brockton, Carver, Duxbury, East Bridgewater, Easton, Halifax, Hanover, Hanson, Kingston, Lakeville, Marshfield, Middleboro, Pembroke, Plymouth, Plympton, Rockland, Stoughton, Wareham, West Bridgewater and Whitman.
For more information about services for seniors or if you know an elderly person (e.g., family, friend, neighbor) who you think might need assistance, contact OCES at 508-584-1561.
About OCES
Incorporated in 1974, Old Colony Elder Services (OCES) is one of 27 private, non-profit Aging Services Access Points (ASAPs) in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts.
The organization’s mission is to provide services that support the dignity and independence of elders by helping them maximize their quality of life; live safely and in good health; and, prevent
unnecessary or premature institutionalization.
The agency has 130 employees and operates more than 12 programs serving elders, their families and caregivers. For more information call (508) 584-1561 or visit the website at www.oldcolonyelderservices.org.
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